16 February 2004

Battered Women in England

The issues of violence against women and their children are everywhere in England.  The nightly news is peppered with stories of abused, molested and sometimes murdered children.  Often these stories include their moms.  Sometimes the moms have asked for help but mostly they don’t know what to do, so they try to handle the problems on their own.

The only location for an abuse shelter in our area is Ipswich, a large port town near where I live in Hadleigh.  From the moment you enter Ipswich, in any direction, you pass rows and rows of connected tiny narrow two-story brick houses that look like small versions of NY brownstones.  There is no front yard.  No personality.  If poverty had a face these houses would be a part of it.  The rooms are the size of a normal American closet.

The town is rough feeling too.  It doesn’t seem that clean, and most areas of the city feel like folks are packed in like canned sardines.  According to the EAST ANGLIAN newspaper the robberies, muggings, rapes and drug arrests are plentiful…and often not solved by the police.

All of that tells me that, like or it not, there has to be violence happening in a major portion of those tiny row houses.  And even though there is a lot of lip service paid to preventing family violence I am convinced the need is great, and the response from the “system” is pitiful.

Over 30 years ago, long before America answered the call, England’s Erin Prizey founded what was to become “the battered women’s movement”.   Since those days the government here has shelled out a lot of money to build and maintain “refuges” for abused women.

There are two of these in Ipswich…big modern 8 bedroom brick “houses”.  Women can stay for up to 9 months while they wait for the “Counsel” (the local government) to find affordable housing for them.  Women can receive “benefits”, which arrive quickly once she has applied.

Right after I moved here I called up the Ipswich Women’s Refuge (IWF) to volunteer my time.  I was offered a meeting with the executive director, which surprised me.  All I wanted to do was help out in the shelter.  Although my skills are in raising money and planning, I am happy to cook or clean or just listen.

After a little negotiating over time and place I agreed to meet for what turned out to be a three-hour meeting where we discussed their money needs and other administrative concerns.    

I also learned that during the time a woman and her children are in the refuge she receives counseling, assistance with legal and benefit issues, and a host of other help.  The counselors who work with the women are called “advice workers”.  The woman’s children receive similar help for the child workers.

At the end of the meeting I volunteered to help them develop a program for recruiting individual donors (of money) or re-vamp their counseling program. 

I’ve ended up spending time with two advice workers and the assistant director.  One of them has worked at the refuge for 20 years.  Before that she had been abused herself.  These women were full of concern and passion for their work.  Their biggest headache is all the reporting they have to do (paperwork) to get all of that “free” money, mostly from the government.

For now we are going to establish some “peer” counseling groups in both the refuges and in surrounding communities.  I believe that most women who are abused will never go to a shelter, so it is important to go to where the women are living their everyday lives.  Plus I believe that women often have the answers…they just need the opportunity to come together.

Right now IWR is in shock that my recommendations don’t mean spending more money.  I guess because I am an American I am supposed to think that all of the British government money makes the project rich, and act accordingly.

I hope the readers of this column will think of the two marvelous projects in Zanesville (Transitions:  454-3213 and Response Victim Assistance:  454-6001) who assist abused women and their families…and do something to help them…like write a check.  Without money they can’t pay the electricity bill.  It’s tax season…how about sending them your tax refund? 

AND if you need help pick up the phone and call Response or Transitions.  Over 23 years ago I made a phone call that saved my life, and I am grateful for the help I received.  That’s why I keep trying to give back, no matter where I am in the world.